They say that everyone has a story, yet few choose to unveil their lives to the world. I am neither different nor extraordinary, but I have reached a realization—I have a story to share, and I do so with purposeful intent. I want to chronicle the journey of an ordinary person who, almost unexpectedly, brings everything they have known to a sudden halt and embarks on a complete upheaval of their existence.

I'm talking about changing everything—career, marriage, family, hobbies... everything. And the truth is, I'm not finished yet.

But why? Ah, that is the challenging question—one I still struggle to answer. All I can say is that continuing to live as I have been is no longer sustainable. I yearn to understand myself, to decipher the motivations behind my actions, the depths of my emotions, and the undeniable urge to break free from my own skin.

This is not a tale of depression, although I am well acquainted with its grip. It is not rooted in mental disorder or hormonal chaos. Rather, it stems from a dissatisfaction with where life has brought me at this stage. You see, I am 56 years old, and as I pen these words, I have been married for 38 years. I have raised two grown children who have embarked on their own journeys, and I am blessed with three precious grandchildren whom I adore.

What I have been is a good wife, a devoted mother and grandmother, a reliable coworker, a caring sister, and a loyal friend. Yet, beneath the surface, it all feels a little too vanilla. Please don't misunderstand—I love vanilla (especially ice cream!). It serves as a versatile base for a myriad of delightful desserts. However, when enjoyed alone, it can be a tad too sweet, a bit too plain. Pleasant, but lacking that extra zest.

Allow me to touch upon the words "good” and “nice.”  I cannot begin to express how often I have been labeled as "good" or "nice" throughout my life—past employers, friends, even casual acquaintances. Frankly, I have grown weary of being known solely for my goodness. It is not that I desire to be a bad person; rather, I strive to be a better person—for myself. And so, my journey begins at this juncture. I am ready to uncover my true self, ready to embrace new experiences, engage in meaningful conversations, and embark on fresh beginnings.

Through sharing my personal odyssey, I hope to strike a chord with some, offering encouragement to those who yearn to embark on their own transformative journey or simply explore a single facet of their lives. I do not possess all the answers just yet, but perhaps together we can unearth them or, dear reader, you may silently follow along, finding inspiration in the passages we traverse together.